enough is enough, isn't it?

Perhaps one day you'd realize
the circumstances have changed
the situation is different
perhaps you'd realize where you stand
what you can or can't do anymore
the things you can or can't say
the shots you don't get to call anymore
the favors you're better off not asking
how conversations cant take the same road anymore
shared jokes can't be shared no more
and memories once shared are kept to one's self
expectations should be back to zilch
cause you don't owe each other anything
questions once asked cant have the same answers
paths once walked wont have the same footprints
what was one is now two
thus two separate lives must be acknowledged
sharing and caring will forever be
as will the memories
but limitations and expectations
must be firmly set

things are just not the same anymore,

live with it.

i said it.

i still wonder.

i should stop.

i...shut up.

i, goodbye.

please let there be no more posts of these sort,
get a grip of yourself dear girl!
sometimes it gets tough,but the tough gets going.

working makes me fat =(

Cold Environment

+

Lack of Sleep

+
Sit Whole Day

=

Snacking NON-STOP

=

NOT HEALTHY!
:(

Christmas Cheer

i was going to blog about something utterly redundant and depressing and a topic id rather not go back to, so im changing the pace and going for upbeat Yay-happy-cheery post instead! =)

Christmas is coming!!! My favorite time of the year!

as silly as it sounds,
i swear i feel the air spark with the Christmas spirit

the cool wind in the distance waiting to drop us a visit
carols crooning through the speakers
giving the home a sense of warmth
its not long before the tree goes up
all decorated and lighted up
the buzz of everyone talking of Christmas
excitement rippling through the air
the comfort and security in having family gather close by
exchanging not only presents but hugs kisses and well wishes too

this year will be so much better
my wish of so many years finally comes true
id have someone to share christmas with
id have someone to attend Mass with
someone to hug hold kiss cuddle
this year will be wonderful
a new tradition comes about

much love hope joy and Faith this year

i cant wait for Advent!

Unraveled

Much unraveling has been done
Both in confessing and being confessed to
Some easy-peasy spilling
Some hard to swallow details
Of relief and joy
And melancholy and sadness
Or withdrawal and defensiveness
The struggle within
Of inner conflict
To keep things at bay
Or cling on to the buoy
To keep up the pillars
And not crumble under pressure
To be strong in everything
And show no ounce of weakness
The tug of war
The push and pull
The bittersweet
The denial
The facts
There really is no end to madness
Just the go with the flow
Hope for the best
And prepare for the worst
For there's no telling what the future holds

Where she is concerned
The feeling is good
Its great, its awesome
Its promising
Its fulfilling
Its reassuring

Where another is concerned
Its worrying
Its upsetting
Its relieving
Its uncomfortable
Its unforgettable

Where the middle is concerned
There are no words
Just a middling stand
Of two similar extremes

Of home, work & blessings

I haven't had the chance to update for so long.

Just so everyone knows, I'm back in KL for good =) for those who didn't realize my disappearance, you now know that I've been away for a few months in Ipoh since late April and just got back mid October.

Throughout my life since I first started working, I've always only held parttime jobs in about 5companies holding about 6positions throughout different times for over approximately 7years already. I now (for the first time ever) hold a full-time job, working 9 to 6 in an office =)

I have since stopped my wild havoc crazy fun behavior in terms of stopping alcohol, stop clubbing, and limiting junk food intake as well as limiting shopping or gossiping hours =)

The past few months have been a rollercoaster ride, from the worst of situations and emotions to the most blessed moments and feelings. I have the occasional slaps in the face by God so as to remain humble and continually be thankful for all He has done for me thus far. I believe He has plans for me and He will guide me through anything and everything.

So yes, my life thus far. Miss me? Cause I most certainly miss blogging.

I'm off to bed now, goodnight =)

Sent by Maxis from my BlackBerry® smartphone

I'm in Love!

I once asked God for an angel
He now answered and gave me you
Someone to love
To care for and pamper
To shower with attention
To provide distraction
Occupy my every moment
Someone to protect me
To have and hold
For all eternity

I could stare at you all day
Breathe you in like air
Watch you as you sleep
Catch your secret smiles
Hold your hand in mine
Run my fingers through your hair
Snuggle up to you
Cuddle up and kiss you
Hear your voice resonating
Feel you wriggle and squirm

I once was swept by the notion of love
The illusion of family acceptance
Biggest whirlwind yet
But now I can rest assure
I'm in love with the right one
My one and only
My sweetheart
Loved and accepted by the family
And even more so by everyone around

I am blessed indeed,
I love you Darling!
And I'm proud to have you with me.

Sent by Maxis from my BlackBerry® smartphone

Not That Girl

I'm not the girl with the pretty face
With big round eyes
And cute pouty lips
Nor cascading curls

I'm not the girl with the hourglass body
With skinny slim frame
Or nice rack of assets
Nor ample bottom

I'm not the girl with updated fashion
With perfect messy updos
Or up-to-trend clothes
Nor gazillion heels

I'm not the girl with "the" personality
Of bubbly giggles
Or smooth conversations
Nor coy shy flirtatious smiles

I'm not the girl one wants
Nor the girl one needs
I'm just a girl of my own
Just a complicated simplicity