recently we college girls spoke of ridiculous breakup reasons and every solid reason as to why a relationship would not work out or why that “perfect one” is actually the “perfect none”.
yet funny enough, no matter the reason or excuse, we’d fall for it anyway and go crawling back to the sucka, begging to be forgiven (though not at fault) and ask to be taken back. worse still, we’d harbor the hope that a change would somehow come around.
i know the circumstances, i know the reasons, i know the consequences. i told myself no, i thought to myself that i was okay with things. but heck my oh my oh my oh my, was i ever so wrong. it was no need for words to be spoken, the mere presence, the mere sight, was enough to bring me crashing back down to reality. and here i had high hopes in myself that i was stronger.
and to make things worse? contact was initiated. sigh. thanks a lot la. seriously. ever heard of tact? the play of words? double meaning? loaded statements? innuendoes? doubt so, yet unknowingly highly skilled at it. how ever did such influence affect me so heavily?
this girl is weak. this girl has self-control issues. this girl is easily addicted to tempting “bad for health” stuff. this girl swoons ever so easily too. this girl harbors the impossible heart-shattering hope in spite of all the obvious warnings and danger signs. this girl falls, in love.
so yes, i still prefer the score of the no collision contact worlds. makes it easier somehow though quite hard. its been what? say 3 bumps so far? 0 the rest of the way? not that im keeping count, i think. but anyway, yes, so far i’ve been coping with the no contact rule i set myself to. funny enough, contact came not from me. and guess what do i do? legs go all jelly on me and thus im rendered weak to return contact.
ending? zilch.
left in a lurch yet again.
bravo! *claps*
why does anyone bother?! UGH!
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