my biggest setback

when I start something,
I get really excited about it,
everything just seems,
unbelievably too close perfect,
no flaws can be found,
nothing could ruin the perfect image I've set in my mind.

I just look forward to it,
it seems so exciting,
so enthralling,
something I could stay committed to.

then, it happens.

everything starts crumbling,
exciting unexpected-
becomes a rigid routine,
dull and boring.

it always happens to me,
I can't commit myself to something for long,
even if I do,
I wouldn't enjoy it,
I would be doing things without my will.

That's my biggest setback,
my biggest fear to get committed to anything,
for I know,
I can't hold on for too long.

 

*a note to love: keep outta my way, I don't want to hurt others no more.*